SO. I have such an amazing guest blog this week. My awesome friend, mentor, sponsor, and role-model has allowed me to get my hands on a blog entry she wrote in which she faces an addiction she has. To sugar. Addictions can come in all forms. People can be addicted to drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, relationships, sex, TV, facebook, exercise.... you name it. It doesn't have to mean that the person isn't absolutely incredible, approachable, and pretty much normal. This is why I love Kelsea's entry. She lets us see that having an addiction of some kind (and most people have one to something) is super understandable--- even relatable. Read on below:
I am an addict...
to sugar that is... something I have been denying for quite some time. But after reading only a few chapters of Sugar Blues by William Duffy, I feel almost a weird sense of relief when he compares sugar addiction to that of hardcore drugs. It was last night with my life coach (www.gabriellebernstein.com), that she asked I make a commitment to abstinence for 90 days! I was at the point of needing to be told what to do, lost in my direction, but so ready to be over the insane cravings that turned into binges on boxes of cereal, ice cream, cookies and any other sweet you can name (except fruit of course). Could i do it? Yes of course I could, and better yet I would blog about my experience, write down all my meals and be a warrior of my addiction!I would incorporate all my knowledge as a Weight Watchers member over the last three years, my new knowledge of food combining from Natalia Rose's Detox 4 Women, and my general sense of nutrition to combat the addiction that would soon harm my body and mind in perhaps ways I would never consider. I felt good, empowered, a little nervous, but excited because today I counted day one no sugar.
No sugar that is until.. after a home made meal of salads with a friend, we went for a walk. On this walk on New York City's Highline park, at the bottom of the stairs on 20th St and 9th Ave we spotted.. ICE CREAM!! All natural creamy delicious- MINT Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream. I mean are you kidding me!!! So we split a small one scoop.. not bad right?Of course after we finish, my mouth still watering and my body CRAVING more, I reveal to her my 90 day plan. "I will start tomorrow, I forgive myself and move on" I tell myself. However once we part ways and I am on my trek back to my apartment around 9 pm, I want more!! I think about Tasti Delight, or Pinkberry.. cold creaminess with a sugary topping.. and I want it, I want it so badly! I manage to make it to my apartment safely only to end up in the shower composing in my mind the email I will send to Gabby tomorrow, telling her I didn’t think the sugar detox necessary, 90 days is a very long time, and it is, but I was scared. Scared at the thought, the similarity of self talk between myself and perhaps that of an alcoholic, or drug addict.. thinking that I could control this, I can just dabble once in a while, and it's ok.
But it's not ok! Eating the sugar, yes its ok, do I eat it way too much? Yes! as it is not good for my body and mind. But what isn’t ok , what really isn’t ok , is allowing something outside myself to control me, to turn me into a mad woman. A woman who self-sabotages, makes herself physically ill from eating and ruins hours, days, weekend, vacations in the guilt and pain beginning with the first bite of that sweet something that starts a downward spiral to sug-ell (sugar hell)
The guilt, the pains, the bloat. Feeling tired and cranky and even worse knowing that I was doing it all to myself. A sugar addict I was indeed.. And so today I begin Day one, today, NOW - no Sugar.
Kelsea's voice is clear, familiar, and honest. Everyone bargains with themselves from time to time.... it is part of who we are. (Just today I bargained with myself to run a shorter run than planned because I really didn't want to go. But once I was out there, a few miles in, I felt good. I decided to take the run longer... something I NEVER do... and wound up running 6 miles, and the last three in less than 21 minutes!! So bargaining CAN be reversed...) Kelsea's willingness to share this with us and let her private and true thoughts be heard is just shows how completely common these thoughts are. We all think them sometimes. But she is right. To allow anything or anyone to control you is completely unacceptable. YOU control your actions, beliefs, and thoughts. You are a PRODUCT of your thoughts. And if you want a kick butt life, you better have kick butt thoughts. Use this awesome post as a power of example. Don't let those thoughts that bog you down creep in. And if they do, find out their source, and clean them UP. I can post about how to do that later. Until then, THANK YOU SO MUCH KELSEA!!
PS--- Kels is also the voice behind Her Future's Daily Light! Daily Light is a group on the site that you join and you get an inspirational quote EVERY morning. Kelsea finds them, sends them out to us in the morning, and sets us up to win. Because she is a winner too!
Today's was... "Again and again, the impossible problem is solved when we see that the problem is only a tough decision waiting to be made." Robert H. Schuller
