As seen on Your Bella Life
If you were certain that every word you spoke was literally going to manifest in your life, what would you start saying and what would you stop?
What if you were certain that every word you spoke could either make you feel happy or crappy? How would your conversations shift?
What if you were certain that every time you spoke about what you didn’t want in your life, you increased the chances of that very thing to coming into fruition?
This is actually exactly how life works. Perhaps, not every word that we speak manifests physically in our life, however most do. We speak about never being able to lose weight, find single men, or our annoying jobs. Then we wonder why we never lose the weight, aren’t dating and our job keeps sucking.
As women we speak often and not about very important things. We complain and gossip. The scary thing is we don’t even realize it. If you are already offended, I can tell you, its because deep down you know its true. It used to be (and sometimes still is) true for me, too. I recently searched through my sent emails, looking back to emails from 2005! I have deleted them all since. But, when reading those emails, I couldn’t believe the words and stories I typed and shared.
Now that I am working on my awareness of the words I speak, I without judgment (I promise) notice the tone, the words and the stories we, as women, share. On the streets or on our cells phones, I so often see more scowls rather then smiles and hear angry tones rather then laughter. And, it’s not serving us.
With every word we speak, we are making a choice to feel a certain way. Why retell a story about a person who upset you, to friends, sometimes three different times! It made you feel bad the first time it happened? Isn’t once enough? Let it go and talk about something that makes you feel good.
Women are good at telling each other what we don’t want. But when asked what we do want, sometimes coming up with a list of ten is a struggle and often a “don’t want” is thrown into the mix just out of habit. We talk about what we don’t want, as if it will make the very thing go away. However, it does the exact opposite. Not only does talking about that which we do not want to happen in our lives make us feel annoyed, frustrated or mad, but it energizes that which we do not desire. That which we energize is often what the universe brings to us. Not to hurt us, but because it doesn’t understand the word don’t.
No one has ever complained their way into a great relationship, gossiped towards a loving friendship, or worried themselves into a promotion. Months or weeks of life taken up by irritation or worry for one fleeting moment of excitement, are not worth it.
Want to see just how it works? Try this exercise:
Call up a friend and talk to her about all the qualities you do want in a man or job, apartment or for yourself. Beware not to mention anything you do not want. When you end the call, write a few adjectives describing how you feel.
Call up another friend (or the same one) and tell her what you do not want in a man, job, apartment or in your life. While you’re on the call and after, notice how you feel. Write adjectives that describe that feeling.
Recently, I heard that our words are prayers. Think about what your asking for and keep in mind, God doesn’t hear the word don’t.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
10 Steps to Feel Sexier Now
As first seen on The Beauty Bean
Ah “Sexy.” Just the word alone is intriguing. Admit it or not, it’s almost always the way we want to look and definitely one of ways we want to feel. As women, it’s in our energy. While some women certainly exude sex more then others; as females, we all have the power to own – and enhance – our innate sexiness. It’s in our every bone; it’s in our lips, eyes, curves and aura. And while sexy certainly looks nice, it feels even better.
If you not feeling sexy enough, or just want to amp up the intensity, follow these tips to feel red hot. Beware: these tips may increase confidence, dating options and maybe even physical contact.
High Heels. The higher the better. Put them on and strut around, even if only for yourself. We’re not sure of the science behind it, but there is something about an extra few inches that always similarly lifts our mood.
Juice. No, we don’t mean not to eat! But when we aren’t feeling sexy, we tend to feel heavy, thick, bulky; anything but hot. Just a single green juice can bring you back into awareness of your body and mind, increase mental clarity and give a feeling of lightness.
Ambiance. Set it. Don’t wait for “him” to light the candles, dim the lights and get under clean soft sheets. Extra credit if you wear lingerie.
Pamper. Whether at a spa or at home, bring pleasure into your world. Maybe give yourself a manicure, take a bath or give yourself a massage. Treat your sexy self as you want to be treated.
Move. You want to feel sexy, then do that which makes you sexy. Sometimes we feel hottest in our gym clothes, with a light glistening of post-workout sweat. We know, it sounds crazy, and maybe even a bit gross, but movement will get you out of your thoughts and back into your body, which is, believe us, inherently sexy.
Mantra. When you just aren’t feelin’ it, no matter how much make-up you have on or how hot your outfit is, you need to change that feeling – and feelings come from our thoughts. So, flip your thought by repeating a mantra to yourself. Try, “I am a sexy red hot woman” (or something of that nature). Fake it till you make it, say it till you feel it.
Dance. This tip shows up a lot, but that’s because it works!! It gets you moving, puts you back in your body and you can do it in heels. Just be sure to stay away from the mirror. If it feels good, it looks good, so don’t judge yourself. Put on the sexiest song you know and seduce yourself.
Laugh. Pull up YouTube, screen some hysterical videos and just take a few minutes to laugh. There is something sexy about a funny man and something sexier about a funny woman. Chelsea Handler anyone? Laughter is hot!
Go the extra mile. So often when women dress up it’s for a reason: a date, an event, a night out with the girls. How about you dress up for you. Make-up, sexy undies and a favorite dress from your closet can make all the difference. It doesn’t need to be a tight little dress. Put on your favorite jeans if they make you feel sexiest, it will show in your energy.
Switch it up. Being stuck in a routine can become dull and make us feel equally lackluster. Add some color, buy a new outfit or pull out an old piece you love wearing but just haven’t thought to in a while. Change is bold, change is sexy, and so are you!
Ah “Sexy.” Just the word alone is intriguing. Admit it or not, it’s almost always the way we want to look and definitely one of ways we want to feel. As women, it’s in our energy. While some women certainly exude sex more then others; as females, we all have the power to own – and enhance – our innate sexiness. It’s in our every bone; it’s in our lips, eyes, curves and aura. And while sexy certainly looks nice, it feels even better.
If you not feeling sexy enough, or just want to amp up the intensity, follow these tips to feel red hot. Beware: these tips may increase confidence, dating options and maybe even physical contact.
High Heels. The higher the better. Put them on and strut around, even if only for yourself. We’re not sure of the science behind it, but there is something about an extra few inches that always similarly lifts our mood.
Juice. No, we don’t mean not to eat! But when we aren’t feeling sexy, we tend to feel heavy, thick, bulky; anything but hot. Just a single green juice can bring you back into awareness of your body and mind, increase mental clarity and give a feeling of lightness.
Ambiance. Set it. Don’t wait for “him” to light the candles, dim the lights and get under clean soft sheets. Extra credit if you wear lingerie.
Pamper. Whether at a spa or at home, bring pleasure into your world. Maybe give yourself a manicure, take a bath or give yourself a massage. Treat your sexy self as you want to be treated.
Move. You want to feel sexy, then do that which makes you sexy. Sometimes we feel hottest in our gym clothes, with a light glistening of post-workout sweat. We know, it sounds crazy, and maybe even a bit gross, but movement will get you out of your thoughts and back into your body, which is, believe us, inherently sexy.
Mantra. When you just aren’t feelin’ it, no matter how much make-up you have on or how hot your outfit is, you need to change that feeling – and feelings come from our thoughts. So, flip your thought by repeating a mantra to yourself. Try, “I am a sexy red hot woman” (or something of that nature). Fake it till you make it, say it till you feel it.
Dance. This tip shows up a lot, but that’s because it works!! It gets you moving, puts you back in your body and you can do it in heels. Just be sure to stay away from the mirror. If it feels good, it looks good, so don’t judge yourself. Put on the sexiest song you know and seduce yourself.
Laugh. Pull up YouTube, screen some hysterical videos and just take a few minutes to laugh. There is something sexy about a funny man and something sexier about a funny woman. Chelsea Handler anyone? Laughter is hot!
Go the extra mile. So often when women dress up it’s for a reason: a date, an event, a night out with the girls. How about you dress up for you. Make-up, sexy undies and a favorite dress from your closet can make all the difference. It doesn’t need to be a tight little dress. Put on your favorite jeans if they make you feel sexiest, it will show in your energy.
Switch it up. Being stuck in a routine can become dull and make us feel equally lackluster. Add some color, buy a new outfit or pull out an old piece you love wearing but just haven’t thought to in a while. Change is bold, change is sexy, and so are you!
Monday, May 3, 2010
Spring for Love
As first seen on Your Bella Life
It’s Spring time in New York City. After a cold winter you can imagine my excitement for lighter clothes, warmer weather and iced Starbucks. City residents come out of their tiny apartments and move from the sidewalks and stores to the parks and piers. As they say about spring, the season linked to procreation, love is in the air. You can literally feel the shift if you pay attention. Notice more smiles, relaxed bodies and a whole lot of love.
This Spring I decided to practice a new way of living I call Spring for Love. I started this practice this season but I can use it, and it will help me, all year long. When I say spring for love I am not talking about the season but rather the conscious action of noticing love. When I speak of love it can range from enjoying an ice latte to being loving in your own relationships. Love is not limited to romantic relationships and family but can be found in a friendship, in a relaxing afternoon alone, even in a flower.
For example today walking down my street I practiced springing for love. I first looked up at the sky and noticed how blue it was. I took a deep breath and noticed to my right a window with a beautiful pink flower in it. I then passed a building with a door, a bright blue color that I love. This all was within about 10 steps; imagine if I have been springing the whole block.
After taking time to notice just three simple expressions of love in my own life, I felt better and that is the purpose of this exercise. Noticing love, aka that which brings you joy, will lift you up to feeling better then you could imagine. It can become so easy to get wrapped up in all the drama and lack in our lives. Whatever it may be, the more we notice the bad in our lives, the more bad we will see. Luckily this works both ways, as the more love we see in our lives, the more love shows up for us to take notice of.
I urge you to spring for love from the moment you wake, to the moment you go to sleep noticing in every area of your life, that which brings you joy. You will notice a shift in the way you feel and the people around you will most likely notice this shift too.
Start Springing:
1. Set the intention. Every morning and throughout your day state out loud your intention. For 21 days speak your intention to Spring for love, all day long. When you do this you put yourself in the mental mindset of accomplishing your goal. Saying it aloud reinforces this idea to yourself and also allows you to indirectly ask the universe for its support in your intention.
2. Be relaxed. We tend to run from one thing to the next rather then taking in our experience. Make sure to notice this beautiful world and let nature show. Melt over the adorableness of babies and puppies, or the beauty of other people. Remember the more love you appreciate, the more of it you will see.
3. Enjoy. The concept behind this exercise is to fill you with feelings of love and joy, have fun with this, notice what you notice, take it in and move on. Far too often, I am guilty myself, we allow ideas that are supposed to be good for us, become a hassle and a source of stress. Bring yourself back to the core message behind Springing for Love, restate your intention, breathe and relax.
As Editor in Chief and Bella Life Founder Nitika Chopra says “love is possible in every moment” and Ill add “if you’re aware of its presence.” Tis the season to Spring For Love!
It’s Spring time in New York City. After a cold winter you can imagine my excitement for lighter clothes, warmer weather and iced Starbucks. City residents come out of their tiny apartments and move from the sidewalks and stores to the parks and piers. As they say about spring, the season linked to procreation, love is in the air. You can literally feel the shift if you pay attention. Notice more smiles, relaxed bodies and a whole lot of love.
This Spring I decided to practice a new way of living I call Spring for Love. I started this practice this season but I can use it, and it will help me, all year long. When I say spring for love I am not talking about the season but rather the conscious action of noticing love. When I speak of love it can range from enjoying an ice latte to being loving in your own relationships. Love is not limited to romantic relationships and family but can be found in a friendship, in a relaxing afternoon alone, even in a flower.
For example today walking down my street I practiced springing for love. I first looked up at the sky and noticed how blue it was. I took a deep breath and noticed to my right a window with a beautiful pink flower in it. I then passed a building with a door, a bright blue color that I love. This all was within about 10 steps; imagine if I have been springing the whole block.
After taking time to notice just three simple expressions of love in my own life, I felt better and that is the purpose of this exercise. Noticing love, aka that which brings you joy, will lift you up to feeling better then you could imagine. It can become so easy to get wrapped up in all the drama and lack in our lives. Whatever it may be, the more we notice the bad in our lives, the more bad we will see. Luckily this works both ways, as the more love we see in our lives, the more love shows up for us to take notice of.
I urge you to spring for love from the moment you wake, to the moment you go to sleep noticing in every area of your life, that which brings you joy. You will notice a shift in the way you feel and the people around you will most likely notice this shift too.
Start Springing:
1. Set the intention. Every morning and throughout your day state out loud your intention. For 21 days speak your intention to Spring for love, all day long. When you do this you put yourself in the mental mindset of accomplishing your goal. Saying it aloud reinforces this idea to yourself and also allows you to indirectly ask the universe for its support in your intention.
2. Be relaxed. We tend to run from one thing to the next rather then taking in our experience. Make sure to notice this beautiful world and let nature show. Melt over the adorableness of babies and puppies, or the beauty of other people. Remember the more love you appreciate, the more of it you will see.
3. Enjoy. The concept behind this exercise is to fill you with feelings of love and joy, have fun with this, notice what you notice, take it in and move on. Far too often, I am guilty myself, we allow ideas that are supposed to be good for us, become a hassle and a source of stress. Bring yourself back to the core message behind Springing for Love, restate your intention, breathe and relax.
As Editor in Chief and Bella Life Founder Nitika Chopra says “love is possible in every moment” and Ill add “if you’re aware of its presence.” Tis the season to Spring For Love!
10 Steps to Ease Your Woes
As first seen in The Beauty Bean
By Kelsea Brennan
We all stress. It’s part of the human experience and sometimes even an adaptive coping mechanism for when you need your adrenaline to start pumping in order to get your out of a potentially dangerous situation. Stressing over your taxes, though, is not one of those situations in which a fight or flight response is beneficial – you can neither fight The IRS for flee from it, well, not without serious legal consequences anyway.
Rather, stressing out over your taxes, is bound to hurt you more than help you. Plus, stress can have serious health consequences (including not-so-pretty costs to your skin and hair). Even worse, though, is the fact that stress is often a self-perpetuating cycle: the more you stress, the more you’re stressed. To curb this counterproductive cycle and have you feeling better in no time (or until the check to IRS clears, anyway), follow these 10 quick steps for a stress-free tax day.
Meditate. It is the number one, scientifically supported tool to reduce stress. Don’t say you can’t, don’t know how, or that your mind won’t shut off. Just sit, be still and breathe. Do it at least 5 minutes in the morning and, if you can, for additional brief moments throughout the day.
Don’t Over-Think. Thinking “I have so much to do, it will never get all done, I can’t deal” will only energize stress and worse the situation. Acknowledge your negative thoughts, remind yourself that it’s ok to feel a bit stressed and move on.
Exercise. Have you ever worked out and felt worse after? Didn’t think so! Exercise not only boosts your self-esteem but also releases feel-good brain chemicals that immediately makes us feel better. Plus, it helps us release our rage, healthfully. Deepak Chopra recently – and need we say brilliantly – tweeted, “exercise is the best exercise.” So, as often as possible, get moving to let the stress melt away.
Steer clear of negativity. Make sure your friends and the people you surround yourself with are positive people who make you feel better and energized rather then drained.. Negative coworkers? Remind yourself that no one can take from you anything you are not willing to give, including your peace of mind.
Treat yourself. Be nice to you! If a friend was stressed you would comfort her with an offer for dinner, a movie or a mani/pedi. Do the same for yourself, you are so worth it.
Be Present. We tend to stress either because we are either feeling upset about the past or anxious for the future. If you are in the moment, the past becomes just a memory and the future an idea that does not yet exist. Practice being present by really paying attention to what you are doing, rather than your thoughts.
Sleep. The average woman needs 7 to 8 hour of restful sleep each night Make sure you are getting enough sleep. Everything is harder and seems worse when you’re tired.
Identify your stressors. When you are aware of what stresses you, you can prepare. You will quickly notice old habitual thought patterns and actions you usually take. Once you take notice, you can create new habits that reduce stress rather then enhance it.
Get outside. Fresh air revitalizes, clarifies and has a beautiful way of creating calm. Try to get outside as often as possible during the week and pay attention to the natural order of nature.
Make time to relax. This does not include the moments you lie in bed as you try to fall asleep. Rather, read a book, do yoga or simply sit on your couch and relax.
By Kelsea Brennan
We all stress. It’s part of the human experience and sometimes even an adaptive coping mechanism for when you need your adrenaline to start pumping in order to get your out of a potentially dangerous situation. Stressing over your taxes, though, is not one of those situations in which a fight or flight response is beneficial – you can neither fight The IRS for flee from it, well, not without serious legal consequences anyway.
Rather, stressing out over your taxes, is bound to hurt you more than help you. Plus, stress can have serious health consequences (including not-so-pretty costs to your skin and hair). Even worse, though, is the fact that stress is often a self-perpetuating cycle: the more you stress, the more you’re stressed. To curb this counterproductive cycle and have you feeling better in no time (or until the check to IRS clears, anyway), follow these 10 quick steps for a stress-free tax day.
Meditate. It is the number one, scientifically supported tool to reduce stress. Don’t say you can’t, don’t know how, or that your mind won’t shut off. Just sit, be still and breathe. Do it at least 5 minutes in the morning and, if you can, for additional brief moments throughout the day.
Don’t Over-Think. Thinking “I have so much to do, it will never get all done, I can’t deal” will only energize stress and worse the situation. Acknowledge your negative thoughts, remind yourself that it’s ok to feel a bit stressed and move on.
Exercise. Have you ever worked out and felt worse after? Didn’t think so! Exercise not only boosts your self-esteem but also releases feel-good brain chemicals that immediately makes us feel better. Plus, it helps us release our rage, healthfully. Deepak Chopra recently – and need we say brilliantly – tweeted, “exercise is the best exercise.” So, as often as possible, get moving to let the stress melt away.
Steer clear of negativity. Make sure your friends and the people you surround yourself with are positive people who make you feel better and energized rather then drained.. Negative coworkers? Remind yourself that no one can take from you anything you are not willing to give, including your peace of mind.
Treat yourself. Be nice to you! If a friend was stressed you would comfort her with an offer for dinner, a movie or a mani/pedi. Do the same for yourself, you are so worth it.
Be Present. We tend to stress either because we are either feeling upset about the past or anxious for the future. If you are in the moment, the past becomes just a memory and the future an idea that does not yet exist. Practice being present by really paying attention to what you are doing, rather than your thoughts.
Sleep. The average woman needs 7 to 8 hour of restful sleep each night Make sure you are getting enough sleep. Everything is harder and seems worse when you’re tired.
Identify your stressors. When you are aware of what stresses you, you can prepare. You will quickly notice old habitual thought patterns and actions you usually take. Once you take notice, you can create new habits that reduce stress rather then enhance it.
Get outside. Fresh air revitalizes, clarifies and has a beautiful way of creating calm. Try to get outside as often as possible during the week and pay attention to the natural order of nature.
Make time to relax. This does not include the moments you lie in bed as you try to fall asleep. Rather, read a book, do yoga or simply sit on your couch and relax.
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